Mount Roulette
by DreamsRMyLife
Summary: Part of the reason for the Black Chocobo was Haurchefant wanting to give the Warrior of Light a magnificent but practical gift so she had no excuse to refuse it. The rest of the reason was so she could stop giving everyone heart attacks showing up on alternative mounts. He supposed it succeeded…sort of.
1. Pony Farm

_**A/N: So, it's not a continuation of my first FFXIV story...it's something that started as a stray thought, that I then wondered about some funny situations, and then grew a story so that I could actually use them. While I do have some time in my busy life for writing, sadly very few pieces ever see completion and none ever reach a point I'm wholly satisfied with. This story is one of the rare few and so here we are.**_

 **Chapter 1: Pony Farm**

Haurchefant was a bit stumped. He wanted to gift the Warrior of Light something, to show his appreciation for all she had done for Ishgard and House Fortemps. Supporting her and the remaining Scions had been a gamble that had paid off well, increasing their reputation and improving their connections. Well, that was the official reason he'd give to anyone who questioned it. Unofficially he truly, sincerely appreciated what she selflessly did for Eorzea as a whole and felt she deserved more than any gift he could give, but some show of gratitude was better than none.

The issue was: what to get her? Something frivolously impractical would be less than useless to her and just take up space with her retainers, probably even thrown out to make room for more useful things to be brutally honest. There were small things he already did, ensuring she had warm meals and hot chocolates and a prime, quiet spot by the hearth whenever she visited Camp Dragonhead to name a few. And while the little things add up he wanted a grander gesture. Going too practical also had its downsides however; her armour already seemed better quality than anything their smiths could produce, same with her weapons, and he was hardly going to approve of her using lesser gear because it was a gift.

He was drawn out of his contemplations by a commotion outside. Curious, he stood and left his desk to see what was going on. It didn't _sound_ like an attack, more like…mild panic and major confusion as opposed to urgent alarm.

Several archers had their arrows trained on the speck of light that was approaching, several lancers were strategically placing themselves within the fort, and everyone else were all staring at whatever was incoming. Haurchefant squinted and was able to make out the fact that whatever it was had a rider, and they didn't appear to be some sort of voidsent. He relaxed once they drew closer and he recognized the Warrior of Light on a…horse?

It was the strangest mount he had ever seen; the pony galloped into the courtyard before slowing to a stop, glanced around at the knights, tossed its head dismissively and then trotted regally over to Haurchefant, who couldn't help but stare. The pony was glowing with aether; literally its mane and tail glowed and thanks to the light snow on the ground he could see the swirling winds around its hooves. And astride it sat the Warrior of Light, smiling at him as if nothing were wrong and well, perhaps it wasn't, but that didn't mean nothing _strange_ was going on.

"Welcome back, my dear friend!" Haurchefant greeted, deciding to play it casual. "And you have a new…pony?" He guessed. It certainly looked like a horse.

The smile widened and she nodded in affirmation, sliding off the mount's back and gently patting its neck.

"May I ask where you acquired it?" Haurchefant continued. The world was a vast place, perhaps on her many adventures to the edges of Eorzea she had stumbled across it.

"From Garuda."

Haurchefant blanched. "As in…the primal?" He asked hesitantly.

She nodded, and with excited hand gestures accompanying her words, recounted her tale of battling Garuda's most powerful incarnation yet and how after the battle she found a whistle. Upon blowing it, the wind aether-attuned pony had appeared. "I call him Xanthos." She finished.

Haurchefant warily eyed the horse, who was staring at him in a condescending manner at a level usually reserved by purebred cats and Ishgardian nobles. "I see."

Well, at least he and his knights would be prepared the next time she arrived on that horse.

…Except the next time, she didn't arrive on that horse.

-o-o-O-o-o-

Haurchefant heard a small commotion and got a sense of déjà vu as he stepped outside to see archers training arrows on a glowing speck in the distance, lancers getting into position, and everyone else finding a good vantage point to see what was coming. The features became more distinguishable from a mere glow the closer it got.

It was a glowing horse.

A glowing horse with a rider.

A glowing horse with the Warrior of Light on it.

Never let it be said that Haurchefant was not quick on the uptake as he wondered, since the colour of the aether was different, which primal spawned this particular mount.

The thundering of hooves even on snow-covered ground sounded like the crashing of rocks down a mountainside. Small rocks orbited the aether-streams around the hooves, and the dark horse's lips drew back in a vicious sneer aimed at every mortal in the general area.

Haurchefant didn't even know horses _could_ sneer.

"Welcome back, my friend." He greeted nonetheless, the coil of trepidation in him unwinding when the Warrior of Light sent him a warm and rather radiant smile back. "I see you have obtained another pony."

She nodded. "From Titan. This is Gullfaxi." She dismounted and began telling the rather fascinating tale of yet another fight between her and a primal.

Haurchefant listened intently and it was only later that he wondered why on earth a primal would even bother summoning a mount that had been sacrificed to them; it wasn't like kobalds were suddenly riding aether ponies about.

Still, he prayed no other beast tribes had tried sacrificing mounts to their gods. Two were enough, thank you.

-o-o-O-o-o-

The Fury was ignoring him, Haurchefant thought. It was either that or laughing at him. Why else would he be staring at the Warrior of Light on _yet another_ pony?

The smell of ozone filled the courtyard as soft crackles could be heard from the blue-white lightning dancing around the horse's hooves. The purple pony pranced around lightly, the sound of its steps like the sharp crackle before the boom of a clap of thunder.

"That's Markab." The Warrior of Light explained with a fond smile at the pony.

Haurchefant was a little jealous about that, but didn't let it show and instead kept his focus on her as he listened avidly to the latest tale of battle against a Primal. Ramuh sounded rather nice and reasonable compared to the others…

(He didn't notice how Markab's eyes narrowed, how he gave a little snort, and then began trotting around the courtyard in a deliberately nonchalant manner towards his back.)

A sudden shock made him yelp and jump.

"Markab!" The reproachful call of the pony's name by its owner was met with a petulant whinny.

Haurchefant stared at the purple pony who was looking entirely too satisfied with himself. He knew that the attention of the lady before him was highly coveted, but he never thought he'd be competing with a horse for it!

"I do apologize for him, Haurchefant." The Warrior of Light said, her lips twitching trying to hide a smile and failing. "Markab is a bit of a prankster, he gets that from the Sylphs I'm afraid."

"Forgiven, seeing as he has made you laugh." Haurchefant replied magnanimously. "Although I do believe that you aren't the only one." He glanced around at his soldiers; some were wearing admirably blank poker faces, others had lowered their visors to hide their faces, and the last were unsuccessfully trying to hold back grins.

He didn't sense anything amiss with his clothing or armour as he gave his body a cursory examination. It was when his hands moved up to his head that he felt his hair was standing up from static. "Ah, so that's it." He chuckled. A harmless prank, all said and done…There was a snort from behind him. Splendid, even the horse was laughing at him.

The Warrior of Light's eyes were sparkling in amused fondness as she gestured for him to lean down. Haurchefant obliged curiously, only to blink in surprise when her hands gently began combing through his hair to neaten it once more. He nearly closed his eyes at the feeling of nails gently scraping his scalp. All too soon—but still a little later than was probably appropriate considering they were out in the open with an audience—her hands left his hair.

Markab could prank him anytime if this was the result; Haurchefant felt like the last one laughing in this exchange.

-o-o-O-o-o-

How many primals had the Warrior of Light fought again…? Haurchefant wondered as yet another pony ran into camp. If he remembered how many primals she had faced then he'd have an idea of just how many ponies he had left to deal with. He hoped there weren't that many; he was becoming accustomed to them and that was probably not good since each one meant yet another harrowing fight against a primal.

It wasn't too difficult to guess the elemental nature of this pony. It may be cold in Ishgard but Haurchefant did know what waves crashing against the shore sounded like; the stamping hooves were like a tsunami. Fortunately instead of looking as vicious as the Titan pony, this one was…sulking?

"Is he alright?" Haurchefant asked the Warrior of Light as he watched the horse kick at the ground with a foot and shake its head with a rumbling whinny that sounded like a grumble more than anything.

The Warrior of Light sent a commiserating glance at her horse. "Enbarr will be fine. He just hates the cold."

"So then why ride him here?" Haurchefant asked, and it was only partly due to curiosity; the other part was wondering if the pony hated it so much why not keep it away from the camp so it was one less aether pony he had to deal with.

"He also dislikes all the other ponies and refused to be the odd one out who didn't get to show off to the camp." She explained.

"I see…" Haurchefant blanched as the pony went over to the brazier in the middle of the courtyard and ran _over_ it, water promptly extinguishing the flames. "Let me guess…if he has to be cold then we do too?" He asked, shaking his head in resignation.

The Warrior of Light looked sheepish as she nodded. "He doesn't like people."

"Do _any_ of those ponies of yours like people…?"

He wasn't very reassured when the answer was a thoughtful, contemplative silence.

-o-o-O-o-o-

It had been a while since her last visit, so when the Warrior of Light returned this time on another pony Haurchefant didn't even spare a moment to be dismayed. Not even the obvious ice primal origin of this pony would deter him from his good mood as he firmly ignored the sounds of cracking ice that were hooves striking the ground. "My dear you are a sight for sore eyes!" He declared as he spread his arms in greeting and gave her a wide smile.

"Has there been trouble?" She asked in concern as she dismounted, clearly seeing the signs of stress and lack of sleep around his eyes.

"Nothing that we can't handle I assure you." Haurchefant replied. "Your radiance is like a balm to the weary."

She smiled bashfully and it only proved Haurchefant correct as he felt his heart lighten despite his tiredness.

Then the whitish blue pony sniffed and shuffled in place, tossing its head back and standing tall and proud as its mane danced in the air like a localized blizzard. It gave Haurchefant an expectant look.

"This is Boreas, and it seems he approves of your charm."

Haurchefant would rather lay the charm on the pony's owner, but at least she was now recognizing his flirting with her as being charming. It was a point in his favour so he decided to humour them and complimented Boreas on his regal bearing and coat that was a match for the purest snow.

This one was by far the vainest of the horses Haurchefant had met, both aether and normal, but at least it didn't seem to hate people on sight.

-o-o-O-o-o-

Haurchefant stared down uncertainly at the form that he had drafted to request a black chocobo from House Fortemps to be gifted to the Warrior of Light. Once he signed it and set things into motion, he'd probably have to do some very good and quick justification about why he'd even consider letting an 'outsider' have one from their flying flock that they had been specially breeding for generations. It could put him into a tight spot and bring him under a lot of scrutiny.

Maybe there was something else he could gift her…there had to be another practical and yet still extravagant gift to give…

His thoughts were interrupted by the doors slamming open as a knight rushed in.

"Sir! The Warrior of Light has returned! And uh, just forewarning you Sir, but the horse is a bit…on fire."

Haurchefant glanced outside to see said horse (he later learned the name was Aithon) stampeding into camp, leaving a blazing trail of hellfire and damnation everywhere its hooves fell and glaring at everyone indiscriminately like it wanted to brutally murder them all and didn't care who went first so long as they _burned_. Turning back to his desk, Haurchefant signed the paper with a flourish and a smile. She was getting a black chocobo. Period.

 **Aside 1: Bird Farm**

Haurchefant looked up as the doors were flung open and a foot soldier ran in.

"Sir! There's a glowing bird approaching!"

Oh dear.

 **Aside 1.5: Kirin**

"Never mind, sir, false alarm; it's still a glowing pony. A glowing _flying_ pony, granted, but a pony all the same."

Haurchefant buried his face in his hands and laughed. Of _course_ it was.


	2. Random Roulette

**Chapter 2: Random Roulette**

So the good news was that the Warrior of Light _adored_ her new black chocobo and now preferred to use it to ride into Camp Dragonhead as opposed to those primal ponies of hers.

The bad news was that the Warrior of Light _adored_ her new black chocobo, and so despite Haurchefant's assurances that she didn't have to, she wanted to reciprocate the gift. What was even the point of him getting her a thank-you gift if she got him a return thank-you gift? Unfortunately, Haurchefant was also a sucker for her happy smiles and therefore couldn't put up more than a token protest of the idea.

Thus landing him in this predicament, where she kept giving him many of the more uncommon mounts she had acquired during her travels.

-o-o-O-o-o-

It was…different. Haurchefant wasn't sure if he'd rather use it as a mount or as an animal fighting partner, however. The Direwolf was snarling and snapping with long sabre teeth and glowing yellow eyes, tail swaying back and forth, alert and just waiting to be given a direction to hunt in. It looked like it would eat Lalafells for breakfast.

The local Karakul population took a bit of a hit, and more stuffy and irritating (although you didn't hear that description from him) dignitaries politely refused the offer to sit by the fire with a warm meal considering what else _just happened_ to share the room when they visited…so overall, the Direwolf was pretty nice actually.

He made sure to tell the Warrior of Light how pleased he was with it, hoping she would deem it enough because he certainly did.

Instead she took it as encouragement to give him more. Should he be delighted or dismayed…?

-o-o-O-o-o-

"And people actually _ride_ on that?" Haurchefant eyed the 'mount' in front of him uncertainly, not even sure if the singular term was appropriate. The main part was a metal chair attached to two chains. He then glanced up in trepidation at the most important part, namely the _explosive void kin_ which were _holding_ the chains.

"I, uh, suppose so sir." One of his men replied, looking wary of the glowing orange bombs holding the chair aloft.

To be fair, the soldier had ample reason; they were glowing orange bombs after all.

Haurchefant knew he had to set a good example for his men, knew he should be the brave one especially since the Warrior of Light had already proven the Bomb Palanquin was 'safe'. "Yes, well, seeing as it was a gift…I suppose…"

The void kin then swivelled as one to look at Haurchefant and _grin_.

"…I suppose it would be a shame to tire them out carrying people." Haurchefant finished brightly.

"As you say, sir."

-o-o-O-o-o-

He thought it was another attack on the fort by a herd of goobbue at first. Then it was noticed that there was only one goobbue…and that it had a rider.

Of course it had a rider.

Haurchefant found himself the…lucky…owner of said Laurel Goobbue, who was apparently a girl, and had some accessories made of flowers and leaves including a crown on her head. Alright, he'd admit it, she was quite sweet; very gentle for a giant mossy creature with skin so hard and leathery it appeared like rock. He decided to call her Laurel (not very original he knew, but how many people named goobbues anyways?).

Then there really was an attack on the fort by a herd of goobbue.

His knights were shouting and calling on reinforcements as they ran out to meet the creatures and stop their rampage…and they were joined by Haurchefant's latest mount. She ran out into the snow and the elezen were treated to the rather unusual sight of a bunch of goobbues halting mid-charge. One toppled over from momentum and fell on its front, only managing to keep its head raised so it could still stare ahead.

Laurel shifted and adjusted her flower crown.

The goobbues all abruptly began trying to brush the snow off their hides and puffed themselves up to look larger and bulkier. Laurel gave a little wave and Haurchefant was treated to the sight of blushing rocks.

The good news was the goobbue attacks stopped…the bad news was they still came charging anyways in their attempts to give gifts to Laurel. The news he very determinedly did not think about was that goobbues obviously had to produce little goobbues somehow and he was very likely looking at a courtship precursor to that process.

That was going to be firmly ignored until he absolutely could not continue to do so.

-o-o-O-o-o-

So Haurchefant still didn't know exactly how he felt about the goobbue, the direwolf was alright, and the bench carried by explosive voidkin was going to be strictly ornamental if he had his way. But the Battle Drake that spat fire and was way too reminiscent of a dragon was surely crossing a line somewhere. Yes, it was convenient when it came to lighting fires for warmth in the cold winter lands. Yes, it had no wings and couldn't fly which was a strong indictment that it was not, in fact, a dragon. No, that did not mean he wanted to keep it around; if this had been any camp other than Dragonhead, he would have expected a riot.

He ended up keeping it anyways, without any backlash. Haurchefant's soldiers were rather familiar by now with his inability to say 'no' to the Warrior of Light unless the situation was her running into mortal peril (a disturbingly frequent occurrence). He just made sure the drake wasn't anywhere in Ishgard; the North Shroud fortunately had non-flammable areas and apparently the drake liked roasting the frequently attacking Ixal, so it was a win-win situation.

(If only he knew that her next few gifts would honestly make him wish for more almost-dragons. Heck, even _real_ dragons were preferable _._ )

-o-o-O-o-o-

Haurchefant blanched when he saw the giant white as bone head with bat-like wings and veiny skin. "Where did you get…this?" 'This', he felt, was an entirely appropriate way to refer to the flying monstrosity; he was rather struggling to come up with words to describe it that wouldn't cause offense.

Hearing about how the Warrior of Light got it from _The Palace Of The Dead_ gave him a few more words, not in relation to the mount though. First she went off to slay Primals, then dragons, and even threw some Ascians and Imperials in there for good measure…and Haurchefant thought surely even she couldn't best that in terms of danger. But no, now she had gone and visited the land of the _dead_.

Tossing propriety to the wind (who needed that anyways?) he grabbed her hand and tugged her forwards into an embrace. "For the sake of my poor heart which nearly stopped, I'm going to need some reassurance that you are alive and well for a short while." He muttered into her hair, long fingers circling her wrist gently so he could feel the warmth of her skin and the steady beat of her pulse.

And he was going to firmly deny the existence of the flying head (and the flying eyeball he was introduced to later).

-o-o-O-o-o-

…Was it just him, or were these things going one of two ways? Haurchefant wondered as the Warrior of Light stampeded into the stronghold on the back of a _Behemoth_.

These mounts either got more and more strange, or more and more dangerous, and either way it could be horrifying and disturbing. Heaven forbid something meet both criteria…

There were faint trembles in the earth with every stomp of those muscular limbs (the thing was all muscles from the looks of it, muscles on top of more muscles). The Behemoth pulled to a stop, threw back its head and roared—causing a miniature shockwave around it in the process—as if to alert others to its presence. Which was completely unnecessary seeing as they had felt its approach and something of its size and bulk would not be missed.

He didn't blame his men for edging sideways around the mount so as not to turn their backs to it. He also took note of—and then carefully filed away in the back of his mind so he wouldn't think any more of it—how some feral crocs had made it rather close to the camp. It would have been more concerning if they had been alive. Not that it wasn't still concerning…the behemoth had to eat _something_ to keep its massive bulk and the less thought Haurchefant put into that the better he'd sleep at night.

-o-o-O-o-o-

Compared to the last few fiascos, the Pegasus that Haurchefant was granted next was an utter delight. Even the location wasn't so bad, he thought, as the Warrior of Light regaled him with tales of lands in the clouds that were just starting to be explored for their strange treasures due to the unusual aethercurrents in the area limiting its access to certain powerful airships. Then she told him about the incredibly strong monsters found there and suddenly things were par for course again.

Still, it bore repeating, this was a genuinely lovely mount.

The Pegasus got into the most entertaining competitions with their Black Chocobos due to their shared traits of flight and feathered wings. Whenever the handlers came to care for them they began ruffling feathers, cleaning them and generally preening and prancing about to show off.

Yes, he'd take winged horses over aether ones any day.

-o-o-O-o-o-

Next time was the Battle Trio, as Haurchefant called them. Apparently they had each individually approached the Warrior of Light after she had been leading several parties on adventures and into battle.

On the one hand, the trio was fairly normal; they were a giant bear, lion, and panther but still _looked_ like the animal instead of some mutated version. And looking like an actual living animal was far better than looking like a forbidden ritual gone wrong (such as the flying head).

On the other hand…the Bear kept wrestling with the Behemoth. The Lion kept roaring and causing avalanches. And the Panther and the Dire Wolf seemed to be in a grudge match the likes of which Haurchefant had never seen before, circling and stalking and generally trying to catch each other off guard by slinking through the shadows. It was effective on everyone _but_ their chosen targets; it was very unnerving to be patrolling only to have a panther emerge from the shadows right next to you.

Then there was the fact that they were gifts that a delighted Warrior of Light had given him with that bright smile and those warm eyes.

Haurchefant was fully aware of his own weakness in these matters, considering the last fact was the most important to him. At least they kept some of the other mounts busy…

-o-o-O-o-o-

This one was a bit odd, Haurchefant thought. In fact, he was a bit concerned about it because a plant that looked like a ball of fluff on a stem was not what he usually thought of as a mount. He couldn't see how it would be directed in flight. It wasn't like it was sentient…

He paused and thought over the various other mounts he had seen so far.

Well, it wasn't _likely_ it was sentient, Haurchefant amended.

At least it was very, very fluffy and soft. Haurchefant placed it in one of the break rooms in the fort for people to take naps on.

It was joined by the Flying Cumulus cloud which was equally puzzling as mount.

Haurchefant also pretended to be unaware of how some of his captains had taken to messing with younger, inexperienced recruits saying that only the pure of heart could ride the cloud. It was amusing how many were hesitant to throw themselves onto the mount to test it lest they fall right through.

-o-o-O-o-o-

Just because Haurchefant thought real dragons would be preferable to flying heads, did not mean he _actually wanted a real dragon_.

The Wyvern let out a deep rumble of curiosity and wondered why its new owner was burying his face in his hands.

-o-o-O-o-o-

Well, the good news was that it loved Haurchefant.

The bad news was that it seemed to only love Haurchefant, water, fish, and the Warrior of Light. And it was mean. It hissed and spat water at anything and anyone that so much as looked at Haurchefant in a manner it disapproved of. Considering the frigid temperatures of the Coerthas, it was a miracle no knights had gotten hypothermia or frostbite yet (well, no important or good ones at least; a few arrogant new bloods had learned the hard way not to insult creatures and just assume they lacked intelligence). A few ogres had been turned into ice statues due to the water hitting them freezing, but those were acceptable casualties.

The Elbst really shouldn't have even liked the climate as much as it did. It was obviously water-based and most of the water in Ishgard was frozen, after all. But apparently the moving river water was good enough for it.

Haurchefant decided to leave it in the water so it could take its aggression out on the local Eft population. At least they wouldn't be hindered by something spitting water at them.

-o-o-O-o-o-

A wave of Ice Sprites charged the outpost, a cold spell having caused an outbreak in the elementals.

A whirlwind spun forwards and knocked them all back.

The Ice Sprites charged the outpost.

A whirlwind knocked them back.

Haurchefant wondered which would tire first: the Sanuwa or the sprites. His latest mount seemed to find them very entertaining and treated the whole thing like a game.

-o-o-O-o-o-

"Sir, the dragons have been repelled!" A knight reported, saluting sharply.

"The patrol dispatched them already?" Haurchefant asked in surprise. The initial report had stated there was a small swarm of them; he had been considering sending reinforcements in fact.

"Well…in a manner of speaking, sir." The knight allowed. "You recall your latest gift?"

Haurchefant thought back to that. Ah yes, the latest one was that strange green insect with a saddle and unusual spray-like contraptions on its rear. "Yes, the Kongamato. What about it?"

"It seems it took umbrage to the dragons flying in the same vicinity as it and disturbing its peace. One flew to its face and roared at it, and it turned tail as if to flee, only…" The knight trailed off. "The patrol described it as a moment of extreme flatulence that nearly knocked the dragons out of the sky with its stench. The dragons quickly fled."

Haurchefant tried not to giggle; it was unseemly and dragons were serious business. Still, it was fortunate that the mount had some remaining chemicals from its time with the Vath in its holsters that it could spray.

-o-o-O-o-o-

The gift mounts had slowed and finally trickled to a stop. Haurchefant was a bit relieved, since he was running out of places in Dragonhead and Ishgard to keep them all. Although it had taken the Warrior of Light literally gifting him all the mounts she could feasibly acquire in the four great nations of Eorzea before that happened.

"Really, this is more than enough." Haurchefant assured her. "Although…perhaps you'd like to visit more frequently, to check up on them?" He asked hopefully, heart beating painfully hard in his chest.

She smiled and nodded immediately her agreement.

"Splendid!" Haurchefant beamed back, feeling like he was soaring with his elation. "Would you join me for a warm meal before you depart? I would love to hear of how you even acquired some of these mounts."

That she accepted the dinner date and spent a delightful evening regaling him with her adventures made everything worth it (flying heads and dragons and all).

In fact, he had such a good time and was in such a good mood with his new good fortune that Haurchefant began planning another gift to the Warrior of Light to show his appreciation and affection.

(Meanwhile, the soldiers of Camp Dragonhead smiled and sighed and shook their heads. _Here we go again_ …they thought fondly.)

 **Aside 1: Spreading the Joy**

"She showed up on a dragon. In Ishgard. In front of the _Holy See_!" Aymeric lamented when he was in the privacy of his own chambers (where there was no risk of anyone overhearing besides his current drinking companion), nursing a mug of something strong. "I know she claimed Midgardsormr as an ally but _how_ could she think that such an entrance was a _good_ idea?"

Haurchefant pat him on the back in sympathy. "If it helps, I don't think it's so much believing it's a good idea, as not recognizing it as a bad one."

"It doesn't help." Aymeric replied flatly, massaging his temples. "And you would know this how, exactly?"

Thinking back to the chaos and heart attacks from ponies (among other mounts best not thought of for long), Haurchefant shuddered a bit. "Trust me, I know." Then he smiled, wide and sharp and a little too much teeth. After all, a burdened shared was a burdened lessened, right? "In fact, I can tell you _all about it_."

 **Aside 2: Stormblood**

"Ah, my apologies, but could you repeat that?" Haurchefant requested blankly.

"The Warrior of Light will be traveling across the seas to Doma." The messenger repeated dutifully.

"Doma…Meaning a whole new continent, a whole new land, new wonders and most certainly new dangers." Haurchefant sighed. Of course she had gone on another adventure. He wished it was closer to home the way her time in Ishgard was…he could hardly help look after her when she was all the way in Doma (plus, that likely reduced how often she'd be able to visit him in the foreseeable future). Then he froze as a sudden realization hit him. "…And new mounts."

 _Here we go again…_


End file.
